I'm hoping that I can pull my head out of my ass and learn to actually talk to people in my classes this semester. Being without my close friends during last school year was stressful, but with 18 hours and paying back loans with 4 hours a week at work I have a feeling that I'm going to be as stressed as ever. I'm excited for my classes but I don't know if I can handle the class load. The most worrying thing is that this is the semester I have to decide my major, or get left behind everyone who will be doing sophomore review during the spring semester.
It's hard to talk with people about my future because I get a little depressed. Art History is amazing and I want to be a part of it's preservation but there is absolutely no way I'll be able to get a job until I get my doctorate. Considering the fact that I'll be starting to take out aid this semester, I'll be in super debt by the time I get my doctorate meaning I will never be financially stable enough to do anything I want to do as a grown adult.
I've come to the depressing conclusion that I will be alone and poor for the rest of my life. Maybe that's exactly my fate, but it sucks either way.
Apologies for the long faced blog post.